Break my heart

I vow to never let it break for me
But for your troubles ...
Its on my sleeve
I give you my heart-break
Unselfishley
So often, daily almost.
Heart break creeps close.
I see it in family
And in friends.
Relationships end
before they begin.
He cheated on her
Cause she lied to him
She wants him back
Regardless of the fact
that he insists he's done
She still insists that she's the one
Loved ones dying
Mostly from cancer
Nah mostly from violence
I cry at the funerals
But never for me
Cause the heart-break isn't mine
Well not today, not this time
Its my neighbors
or a strangers,my man's or my girl
I let my heart break for the world

The Big O is a Big No

There is no way to sugar coat this, so I'll just say it. I am afraid to orgasm. That lack of control scares me to no end. Why? Idk..lol. Maybe because I worry alot about how I look and sound when I'm in the act. I don't wanna frown up or growl or something even worse. That couldn't be the only reason though. 'Cause if that were the case I would masturbate and orgasm in private. But I don't, in fact, I never have. Isn't that crazy? I'm a very sexual person. I don't need a lot of sex. But I need good sex. When I'm not with someone I rarely if ever, get horny. But when I am with someone, I like it often and dirty. So the fact that I don't crave, seek or enjoy orgasms is baffling. It has to be deeper than just image right? I think deep down, I don't feel i deserve orgasms.

Racism

I can't remember the circumstances but I was completing a form back in high school. One of the questions read ''immediate family / household members''. So, slightly confused, I asked ''should I list my sister, who doesn't live in the same house''. To which the white administer replied ''you don't have to worry about listing any cousins or people like that that may live with you.'' CRAZY!

it's hard but i can't get mad

I had to remind myself yesterday of one of my personal rules. '' ALL OF MY CHOICES ARE MY OWN '' This doesn't mean people can't do things that affect my life, it's just that I have to take responsibility for letting them do it and also for the way I react. So now that I'm dead broke and over my head in debt...I can't get angry that my friend who owes me money isn't giving it to me. Even if I know she has it's because we went to the mall yesterday. Where she shopped 'til she dropped. While I was unable to buy anything. What is even further shocking is the way she asks what my plan is for my lack of finances with what I truly believe is genuine concern. Its crazy, I know. But I must remember had I never LET her owe me money she couldn't owe me money. So I can only be mad at myself. Lesson learned.

Digging deep...

So busy thinking I'm gold digging
The whole time I'm goal digging
So nigga you tripping
Cause I have shit that I wanna do
And most of it don't even involve you
Money, cars and biracial ho's
Ha ha ha I laugh at your goals.
So fall back and play your part
cause truth be told
your gold...
couldn't buy my heart
I want so much more
I wanna be whole
I wanna be right
Adopt a kid
Save a life
Strike my own goals
Make my own way
You feeling antsy about the
gold in your mine
I'm just chillin cause I got
goals in mind
But time will tell
we'll both see
it's really you that's
digging me

I did, I swear (lol)

To all the niggas I ever knew
Yep him, and especially you
You know I loved you right?
If for a year, if for a night.

Why try not to cry?

Why cry?
It's not over you.
It's for you.
'Cause I'm looking past you.
Past who you are now.
And seeing the man you could be
should be, and would be.
If life hadn't beaten you so bad
that you cant love me.
Or maybe I'm just making excuses.
And we all know those are useless.
Especially now.
Especially when it counts.
And it does.
Not knowing why.
But still willing to try.
Why cry?

Dreams change ....

When I liked u, I dreamed of u.
Now that I love u, I dream 4 u.
For whatever u want 2 come true.
So when u stop dreaming-
I'll do it 4 u

ForEvery

1 Hello
10 Goodbyes
100 Smiles
1,000 Cries
10,000 Answers
100,000 Why's

Simple Math

FOUR
2 x 2
LOVE
me x you